Venus in Capricorn #1 : Lover, I Want to Hold Hands and Be Kids Again

Loving and inner child healing

“All grown-ups were once children…but only few of them remember it.” - The Little Prince, Antoine de Saint-Exupéry.

I wish I had grown up on the same street as you. I wish you could knock at my door and wake up to us being eight year old again together. Would it have made any difference if I had held your hand at twelve and had promised to love you at twenty-seven ? Would it have made any difference for us to wait for my scraped knees to heal so we could play outside again ?

Would it make any difference now ? And most importantly, would it make us love better now ?

When you tell me about your childhood memories, I want to reach for your hand and guide your inner child through my own childhood. I want to sit next to you on a bench and ask you again “What do you wanna be when you grow up ?” And you would tell me you want to explore space, and I would let you know that I would love to join you and we both would not worry about how long it takes for us to travel back to each other.

When you tell me about your parents, I want to reach for their hands and tell them that they have done their best and they were just kids in love too. I want to cook a meal for your mother and ask her “Why are you so afraid of being a mother ?” And she would tell me she tried hard to be different from her own mother, and I would let her know that admitting that is the greatest difference she has made, and we both would share secret recipes of what it is like to be a woman.

When you tell me about your friends, I want to reach for their hands and let them know that I will never neglect them for a lover. I want to sit outside and burn my neck in the sun with them and ask them “Why did you forget about me ?” And they would tell me they never stopped thinking about our last play date together, and I would let them know that I still have the scar on my chin from that day, and we all would laugh about how I remind them of your childhood celebrity crush.

Lover, I ask you, one last time:

is it childhood memories that you are pushing away or is it me ?

Salma